suppose to continue with birthday pics, but omg i am so blinking tired. i was stuck in the blinking jam from manjung to teluk intan. guess. 2 hours 40 minutes. 42 minutes to be exact. *&^%$#$%^&&. at the bridge. they were tar-ing the road. wt??????so tired, so i wil lcontinue the bday pics when i am not so the tired. meanwhile, i needed to pamper myself!!.i work so hard, so ineed to treat myslef. so so so, i did retail therapy. but one thing only. which is drum rolss.................nokia e71.:)and shes beautiful, and sleak, and shes a qwerty. her name is emma:). stil lgettign used ot her. will upload pics of her too k?havent had time to play much with her yet.

i closed my last case for Nov. so total Nov 5 cases, total sales 18 cases. nothing to shout about, but i'm proud of myself;)so well done adelle:)and keep up the momentum:). dec is my appraisal. i must kick ass:)(i mean i'll try).:P

ok, so i'm gonna continue tomorrow. oh wait, maybe wed. cz i am just so tired. so ok, night. byeee;)

happy birthday+congratulations

firstly, happy birthday to mummy and myself:). was a nice one;). being with ur loved one is the best birthday:). and my best friends(ss team) surprised me last night. i am so otuched. they came with a cake and our car sticker:).. and a bunch of flowers. and not normal rose, but daisies. those beautiful flowers which i love:)...i love all of you. thank you so much:).to mama papa che and chris, u guys r the best family i candream of. ma, thanx for the angpow and wallet:). pa ,thanx for dinner and angpow. che and chris, i love the dragon fly:)thank you:)..and to all my friends who bothered to wish me via sms or fb or any form, thank you. i love you.xoxo. so pics of the lil celebration. and pics from the surpise is in xiang and yau's cam. so will get it from em and post k?these r from mine:)enjoy






















more tomorrow:). night...

happy birthday

happy birthday mama. we love you and you're the best mummy anyone can dream off.

happy birthday;)xoxo

tired

i'm tired of always thinking bout ppl.

i'm tired of always caring for ppl.

i'm tired of always being the one who plans, who organizes, who does every dam thing.

i'm tired of being controlled by ppl's words.

i'm tired of trying to not say anything to hurt em, cz ppl dun care bout me. they blurt it out, and it hurts. so i am tired of taking care of ppl's feelings.

i'm tired of everything in my life. but for work, i am also tired. but i cant give up on this. but deep down i am tired.

i'm tired of hoping!!

i'm tired of thinking, if they will do it or not...

i'm tired.. i really am.

deep down, i feel so disappointed. cz i thought there would be something. guess i was thinking too much. there was nothing, and there will be nothing ever!!

i have this problem, i think too much. i got a hyper active imagination.and this imagination is making me feel down. cz i put hope, i expected something... it happened before, this exact same feeling, but worse back then!but its happening again!!!

i have no outlet. i have so many things playing in my head, so much feelings, so much going on, but i dunno where to let it out!!!...

i am standing strong, trying to, but at times, or even now, i wanna cry, i wanna let go of everything, i wanna just let go, break down and cry, and sleep. i don't like this feeling. but i keep telling myself, i must stand up, i must stay strong. i am the pillar. a lot of ppl have hope on me, thats why i cant fall. but i dunno how long i can stand!!!i am crumbling inside!!!THE TRUTH IS UGLY. I KNOW. but i cant help but feel sad to face it!!!!

when i meet ppl, no one would know i am feeling like this. but this is what is going on!!!and i am all alone!!

stop it

stop inviting me to your stupid club events!!!!its dam annoying!!!not everybody has interest in all this shit!i respect that its your job. but quit sending invitations to ppl who cant go, not interested to go and wont go. send it to ppl who will go or might go.

i went back to branch today. talked to abm. appraisal is next month, and i am stressed. because I've got a long way more to go.. and abm wants figures...i can't do it!!!when i mean a long way means by dec 31st, i got to hit a lot..ayp and number of cases. so no i'm not ok!!but i dun care anymore... i will fight till the end,i wont give up. but if i dun make it thru, its fine. i dun care anymore!!!

I'M LETTING GO of everything, everyone!!!i'm tired..and i am not expecting anyone to run back.so yeah..

there's a feeling of disappointment!

i went to the pc fair today. bought kasperksy anti virus, and alvyn got me some free gifts. which i shall put up the pic later. just not in mood.

sis coming back later.

i'm gonna knit!!

i'm not fully ok. still angry and disappointed. but what ever la.

am going back to sitiawan tomorrow. need to hand up the cases, cz one of it is cc. so need to submit original before month ends.

sales clinic on 3rd. then 6th going kl. meeting francios on 7th afternoon, and night is with the girls...:)@ jaya one.:)

so i am still free on 6th night, and 8th morning. anyone wanna meet me?:)

gonna knit and sleep.

it doesn't feel like my birthday:(.. i feel sad. last year i went through this feeling too. and it sucked. and this year am feeling it too. sigh.

so good night. see u when i see u.bye