i don't know

i don't know where i am. i don't know what am i doing. i don't know how to do it. i don't know where to source for customers.

i am in a whole mess now.i haven't broke my egg for september. both osp and bic. i have another week to go for bic. no prospects, no sales:( i am so confused in everything, and i cant tell anyone also. because it's the same thing again and again. but how?

all i can do is hope and pray. which i have been doing. maybe the way i pray is not right. sigh. who do i turn to?

i feel so frustrated... i feel like a BIMBO. no i seriously do. i want to look beautiful, but i cant work:(
and i feel like guilty towards public bank. you know why, i just got an increment. oh wait, i should say, "yayyyy i got an increment" right? but i didn't. because i cant give them back what they want from me.. sigh. bdw i am happy that i got a rise. which i am not telling, but it's quite a good amount:).

anyways, sigh. i am so stressed i can cry anytime. i already broke down in front of ING ppl, then i have been breaking down countless times by myself.i broke down on the phone with sister when she asked me bout my job, and latest was in front of sayang. i cried so much, and that sweetheart insisted we go buy a drink from 7e:). it was nice cz we just sat in car, and drank shandy. lol. well i did feel better, but then again when i go back to work, STRESSSSSSS. sigh. this is the first time i am sighing so much. never sighed so much before. every word every sentence i say ends or begins with a sigh:( you think i want meh?now i wanna cry again:(.

anyways this blog is supposed to be bout chiangmai. bdw chiangmai was FANTABULOUS. the next blog will be chiangmai k?...goign to ky's house now.

selamat hari raya to all malaysians:). 1malaysia ma...LOL.

love:
baguette