i always told myself..i will not cry fro things that are not important. i will only cry for death.and i never cried simply. actually, can count the amount of times icried i na few years.. but, there were a few things which i actualyl cried for, and feel stupid for crying, but couldn't help it!!!!i cried buckets when that cibai prick dumped me. only my sister, elaine, xin knew how much i cried!!i cried when i was goign through hell with the second fucktard!!who claimed had his problems and did not even have the nerve when i told him i wanted a way out!!!coward!!!!ok, the 3rd one, i did not shed a tear!!sorry to sound so selfish!!but i could not cry.!!guess my feelings were more pissed and angry compared to sad.and i was strong nto to break down. thne i cried fro sugar....a lot. miss her terribly. then i cried for junior when junior left.
and it was lately, as in this 2 weeks i realized i am not that strong after all. all the bull shit of me being tough, me being strong , me not crying.BULLSHIT!!!!there was one incident where me and my sis were talking bout him, and i started crying!!!!i don't know why, but i cried. so obviously i am not that strong after all.
and another incident, which happened 2 nights ago.LC was goign to send me back to college.and i was goign back home the next day. when ihugged him, i kinda felt my eyes heavy and i teared, but of ocurse, he din realize it!!!it was then i realized i am not strong. i can cry. i need someone or something very very imprtant for me to cry!!!and i am soft!!!!i might look otugh, but i am not.so i am just like other stupid girls who cry fro guys or some dumb things!!!i just realized!!!
3 comments:
Wah...an emo post about u being emo. Crying or not isn't something u should be worried about. It's okay to cry (just not over things like when I drag u out for a jog) and it's perfectly normal to cry over matters pertaining to ur loved ones.
Just as long as you can move on and get over what made u cry, then u'll be stronger.
And about me not realizing that u were gonna tear when I dropped u off; I just thought u'd be fine 'cos we won't be seeing each other for about 5-6 days, and not months. It's something we need to get used to. But sorry for being insensitive at that time, anyways. Hope you're fine now. It's CNY...u better be! ;)
=)
well, guess i am not that strong after all.but again, i am just a girl, with feelings!sorry fro being so sensitive the other day!!!this cny is werid.really, i dunno why myself!but igot a cheong sam=)
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